Non-Exempt Individual Contributor: Intermediate

People can be reluctant to give feedback, especially negative or corrective information. Generally, to get it, you must ask for it. Seeking negative feedback increases both the accuracy of our understanding and people’s evaluation of our overall effectiveness. If people are reluctant to give criticism, help by making self-appraisal statements rather than asking questions. Saying: “I think I focus too much on operations and miss some of the larger strategic connections. What do you think?” is easier for most people to reply to than a question.

Sometimes feedback doesn’t seem to fit and it’s easy to become defensive or upset. Defensiveness is a major barrier to self-knowledge. Defensive people receive less feedback. To break this cycle, you will need to follow the rules of good listening. Work on keeping yourself in a calm state when receiving negative feedback. Change your thinking. When getting feedback, your only task is to accurately understand what people are trying to tell you. It’s not your task at that point to accept or reject feedback.

You may have hidden strengths. Others may see strengths that you don’t know you have or don’t think are stand-out skills. If you don’t see them, you won’t draw upon them. Find these strengths through self-reflection. Answer these questions: What comes easily to you? What do you enjoy? When does time fly by? When do you get results? What positive feedback have you received in the past? What themes do you see? What strengths are coming through?